Divorce in the Church: an emerging concern

I have had an interesting conversation with a divorced Catholic who has ceased to go to Church based on two commonly and long standing opinion in the Church, namely, divorce is sin which impacts the exclusion for the communion and a feeling of guilt and shyness to face the so called righteous people on the pews. She has been grappling with this situation for number of years. As a good Christian my immediate advice to her is to welcome her to the church communion. But that does not satisfy her long held believe about sin and divorce.

The Catholic Church is faced with this reality of divorce and remarriage. The Church has been criticised for being liberal and for being too conservative; that makes the task of the Church ever harder. The church is evolving with taking on board the current realities of life. If the Church imposed strict sanctions on the divorcees and remarried persons, they will shy away from the faith, that dissipated the primary goal of evangelization of bringing the kingdom of God. Pope Francis has been on the wheel to take this forward by sending out a questionnaire in view of the upcoming Synod on Family in October. Most people would have felt that the Church must welcome the divorced and remarried into the communion because if God wants it, who are we to stop it. Having said that, this must encourage the faithful to take advantage of the goodness of the Church. Hope this will be foreseen in the Synod on Family, where there will be an extensive discussion and reflection on the pros and cons of allowing divorced and remarried to the Communion.

 Theologian and Cardinal Walter Kasper reassured in an interview that the Church is of sinners and we are all sinners. He said, “There are those who believe the Church is for the pure. They forget that the church is also a church of sinners. We are all sinners. And I am happy that’s true because if it were not then I would not belong to the church. It’s matter of humility.”

The church for me is like a mother. A mother will always love her children. That means whatever she does with the children is with love. She will embrace the children, she will shout at children, she will show a long face on her children, but this is all done in love not with hatred of shunning the children away. A mother will never ever abandon her children or disown her own children. When one of her children is erred and returns home, a mother will always welcome them with an open arm. Is not same with the Church? If Church is instituted by Jesus, and Jesus welcomed people of all sorts, particularly sinners; Jesus ate with the sinners. Hence, it is preposterous when someone who is presumably righteous says that divorced and remarried cannot be in communion with the church. This will make them feel the brunt of life even more.

Our God is a forgiving God, not a God who keeps grudges. Our God is a welcoming God without any discrimination based on status in life. The church doors must be open for all sorts of people because God can touch anyone anytime, God can choose anyone anytime. In fact, we as church need to reach out to the broken people because Jesus came not for the righteous but for the sinners.

Can they receive communion? That is hard question to answer, but someone has to answer, may be the Synod on Family might come out with a brilliant light to that question. The Synod might focus on the aspect of communion as Jesus willingness to enter into receiver and the receiver’s response or the intention to welcome Christ into his life.

An obvious question we can address is, will this reception of the divorced and remarried into the communion belittle the sacrament of matrimony? No, and it must not try to redefine the marriage whatsoever. The threefold feature – that is, unity, exclusivity and indissolubility must be held high. But in our pluralistic situation the church is faced with a huge challenge to maintain the sacredness of marriage. Probably, every member of the Church must think as the body of the Christ and not individual opinions. In the case of the latter, it can be detrimental, as everyone will have his or her own self vested interest in the matter. Therefore, it is significant for all the faithful to think and reflect as to what God wants from a marriage.