Do the important thing

 While driving, I witnessed an accident between a motorcycle and a motor car. Although it was not a major accident, the motorcyclist had his little daughter on the pillion. Naturally, any rider would be angry and react to the situation. However, this rider was not reactive to the situation but proactive and remained calm and went on to comfort his daughter by hugging her. 

This is an extraordinary experience of controlling one's anger and doing the first important thing in life. Our immediate reaction to anger is to vent it on the opponent. This is a way natural way humans behave in a situation of anger. Anger is a normal human feeling in which a person allows his mental stability to be normal just like the physical body has a mechanism to heal itself. How do one deal while angry is an important question or what does one first do when angry? When angry, a person has ample choices but a person must make the right choice and deal with anger. Like the rider in the aforementioned example, one can be proactive and remain calm and sort out the important matters first and then can deal with other unimportant matters. 

Pandemic and Church

 Pandemic is a blessing in disguise

The Church is the communion of the minds and hearts of the people of God. Although COVId 19 pandemic made the Churches close their doors and cancel Eucharistic celebrations, as a blessing in disguise, the pandemic gave a sense of the universality of the Church. The Churches across the world took to an online platform to celebrate the Eucharist. People of God now had the opportunity to witness the celebration of the Eucharist across the world through online platforms. While browsing online platforms, people could access the Eucharist any time of the day from different countries and languages. Notwithstanding the frustrations from not attending the Eucharist physically, it has helped people of God to feel a sense of belonging to a universal Church unlike formally typically confined to countries, cities, and villages. The online platform also helped us to pray together without borders, one such example would be prayer and reflection by Fr James Martin SJ on Fridays.  Everyone was affected by the pandemic and hence also made us realize that we are all together in this struggle as human beings and as people of God. 

Forgiveness is the only way forward

 The Nobel Peace Prize winner Archbishop Emeritus Desmond Tutu is laid to rest in Cape Town, South Africa. I would like to express a short tribute to the Archbishop, a true hero, and a true leader. It was when I was studying theology I was motivated to learn about and from this true hero. His ever-living legacy can help us to be true leaders. In his book, ‘No Future without Forgiveness’, Archbishop argues that we would not know how to be a human being at all, except we learn this from other human beings. We are bound together in what the Bible calls ‘the bundle of life. Our humanity is caught up in that of all others. We are human because we belong. We are made for community, for togetherness, for family, to exist is a delicate network of interdependence for no one can be human alone. Archbishop was key instrumental in an unprecedented attempt at healing a nation when he was named Chairman of the Truth and Reconciliation Commission by President Nelson Mandela. He succeeded to heal a wounded nation through forgiveness. For him, there is no humanity without forgiveness and forgiveness is possible only through peaceful coexistence. He upheld social harmony, friendliness as the great goods of which social harmony is the summum bonum – the greatest good. The teaching of Jesus, ‘to love your enemies’ is personified in the Archbishop, for he expressed, ‘if you want peace, you don’t talk to your friends but talk to your enemies’. He walked the talk and was hailed as a humble true leader, in other words, he was a true servant leader. 

Forgiveness is not forgetting but remembering - remembering not to hit back but to pave a path towards forgiveness. Forgiveness is innate to human beings but hatred is also innate to human beings. It is important to make forgiveness our way of life so that hatred can be overwhelmed by forgiveness. Every religion teaches forgiveness and no religion teaches hatred but for self-interest, hatred becomes a way of life. The world might teach us to hatred but humanity teaches us to forgive. "Eye for eye will leave the people of the world without any eyes". If forgiveness did not exist, humanity would have become extinct. Forgiveness is a way of life in our own families when our children make mistakes, we forgive them but could we not follow the way of life with everyone around us. Archbishop through his life and teachings insisted that people need humanity more than anything in these times. 

As former President of USA, Obama called, Archbishop was a true ‘moral compass’ to everyone around the world especially to leaders and aspiring to be leaders. Archbishop expressed that ‘God’s dream is that all of us will realize that we are family that we are made for togetherness, for goodness, and for compassion.’ Although our world is a beautiful place, we have certain elements of evil and hatred that permeate our society for the selfish motives of the wicked few. These wicked few continue to sow the seeds of hatred so that their agenda is fulfilled at all costs. We need leaders like Archbishop Tutu to recognize and uproot these elements of hatred not through hatred but through dialogue and inclusion. This is the only way forward to a better world if not our world will have more hatred than good because hatred multiplies and leads to more hatred. Leaders in our society such as government leaders, CEOs, managers, and religious leaders must take examples from the Archbishop and embrace his life and teachings. 

I experience therefore I am

Most job application criteria require experience apart from formal qualifications. I have wondered why this is necessary especially when someone is applying for the job for the first time? Unless a person has a job, it is impossible to get the necessary experience.  
Philosopher Aristotle compared the mind of an infant to a blank clay tablet, "tabula rasa" on which experiences leave their mark. This could be applied to adults as well because experience is the best teacher in life. Growing up is a journey that we have to undertake every day of our lives and this journey will bring ample opportunities to experience the specific way of life. As we journey this life, our life is a blank clay tablet that has to be written as we experience situations and instances in life. It is important for any one of us to go through this journey as it unfolds. There are bad and good experiences as the consequence of learning, however, the goal of this journey of experience must be a good experience. The majority of people experience good things in life and this is crucial for our growth and for our happiness. 
The experience leads to knowledge and knowledge and not vice versa. Knowledge from the experience helps us to perform and conduct ourselves well. For instance, unless one has experience of heat, one will fail to recognize the fire. Experience teaches us lessons in life; lessons to cope with life and persevere in endeavors. Our mind craves to have positive experiences and rightly so we will have ample opportunities to fulfill this craving. Despite the negative experiences we can choose to embrace only positive experiences because it is in positive experiences we find our happiness. 3
We could experience pain in the form of feelings in the mind. This painful experience will make us resilient towards the specific situation and help us to cope with it. On the other hand, joyful experiences will propel us to strive to stay in that experience and also help us to constantly seek positive experiences in life. This is important for our existence and a form of the coping mechanism of life without which we will find ourselves delusional or psychotic. Experience conditions our behavior in life. For instance, a criminal commits a crime due to his past experiences of life and most criminals have a negative experience in their early life. 
We experience there we exist and if not for the experience we would be fish out of water. This is one of the important reasons why employers look for experience from the candidates of job. Basically, employers are seeking the knowledge they gained from the experience at the job. It is crucial that we gain as much experience as possible in our everyday lives. Let us strive to experience so that we can cope with life and learn traits of life. 

COP 26 too ambitious

How many of us are aware of the emission of carbon from our own vehicles that we drive every day. We witness this as we step on the road. As we know most combustion vehicles emit a certain percentage of carbon. Be that as it may, some motor vehicles are atrociously emitting smoke into the atmosphere. How can we address the important and urgent issue of emission?  

A number of world leaders gathered in Glasgow to discuss a serious issue of climate change. Pessimistically the Conference of Parties had ample effect on the populace of the world. It seemed optimistic as the grand opening with promising speeches by some of the key leaders including Prime Minister of Barbados and Prime Minister of United Kindom. Thereafter, all other speakers and presenters had a mouthful to speak and advise how we can control climate change within the next 30 years or so. Verbose and vocal presentations boosted the hopes of people and left to think all of us need to do something before it is too late. 

The COP26 took some ambitious steps towards protection of the nature, which is welcome news for many countries. Although some of the steps were unrealistic, they made an impression among all the attendees of the conference. Deforestation, reduction of carbon footprint, and use of electric vehicles among other important topics discussed were of crucial importance. Scientists and academics opined their views of how climate change is affecting humans and animals. Some of the ambitious decisions taken at COP26 could be considered long-run gaols which will take time because of its feasibility such as non-fossil fuel use. 

However, if the leaders addressed the immediate issue of emission from fossil fuel usage on our vehicles and industries. Although there are measures and commissions to monitor the emission, oftentimes they are ignored or shown a blind eye. We can witness the dark smoke from some of the motor vehicles which impact humans directly and nature Every country needs to address this issue urgently and penalize the perpetrators of carbon emission both private motor vehicles or large industries. It would have been helpful if this was done as an immediate measure to control climate change. It is not too late as we are still in the mood for COP26, we can control climate change with immediate monitoring of carbon emission from domestic and industrial burning of fossil fuels.  

Stress without stress

I had met a person who was so distressed and almost on the brink of a mental breakdown. When inquired I discovered that he was being pressured by his manager who is not only incompetent but also disrespectful towards the staff. I realized from this person's situation that talents are brushed aside by incompetent leaders and hence organizations suffer. Most often, employees go silent for this reason who bury their talents. This eventually leads them to be unhappy and distressed. 

Many persons spend most of their active time at their workplaces and spend significant time with their colleagues. The time spent at work is important and it can determine a persons' behavior outside. The jargon, leave work at work is not applicable to day-to-day situations. How many persons have a bad day at work and this badness spills in the home where the family has to take the brunt of it all? Besides, persons have to comply with organizational expectations. Often the staff is burnt-out, not due to work but dealing with the poor leadership and disgruntled colleagues. Persons leave organizations for reasons such as poor leadership. 

It is significant to note one's own mental stability to cope with challenges at work. What can you do when you are super stressed at work? How do you cope with challenging situations? 

1. Talk to a trusted person: It is important to talk to someone you trust who can sift through your situation and guide you in a proper direction. 

2. Confront your superior: Although you might come across as insubordinate it is important to confront your superior but do it amicably. 

3. Represent yourself: Often you find your ideas are not respected however, it is important to represent yourself and express your ideas. 

4. Put it in writing: Oftentimes, we tend to do things word-of-mouth but it is crucial to document every conversation you have with your superior.

5. Have a hobby: Any good hobby will offset distress at work; walk in the park, music, dance, reading, take your dog for a walk. 

6. Take a break: It is important to take a break while you are distressed. 

7. Quit: The last resort should be to quit that is if nothing works out and you have other alternatives, move on to better opportunities. 

Managing stress at work is important and must be your priority because it can ruin your entire day and entire life. One has to find his own way to deal with stress. We might suggest a few guidelines but individuals have to devise their own way to cope with stress. 

Anger is a disease

 I was going to a packed market and the parking was completely full. I managed to get a little passage on the side of the main road, so I pulled over my car to park. To my unpleasant surprise, there was the person who was reserving the passage for his little roadside shop which is not legal. As soon as I pulled over, he started throwing mean curses towards me. I was completely baffled and was upset. Despite the upset, I kept my calm and talked to the angry person asking him to allow me to park for a few minutes only. He went on and on with his potty mouth. I realized there is no benefit in arguing with an angry person so I moved away to park somewhere else. There are several other instances that persons have been angry and used potty mouth. 

I tell this story to enumerate how anger breeds anger and if both parties behave in anger there, there will be violence. The anger breeds anger and leads to violence. Often we see angry people with long faces who have been unhappy and upset in life. All of us have experience of persons behaving angrily towards us. It is noteworthy to mention anger is a disease that needs a cure. I asked myself the question, why are people angry? I have not gotten any satisfactory answer to this question, however, I have discovered for myself that anger is something that can be controlled and cured. 

The following are helpful tips 

1. Shut up: When angry you shut up instead of shutting another person down. 

2. Calm down: let your demeanor be calm while angry, and then you can clarify the issues that made you angry. 

3. Close your eyes: when you realize that you're getting worked up close your eyes and wait for the anger to wind down.

4. Do not react: when your opponent throws curses, you do not react rather wait for the person to calm down to clarify the matter. 

5. Accept your faults: If it is your fault, accept it. 

6. Humble yourself: it is important for you to humble yourself when you are angry. This will help you to see who is wrong and who is right? 

7. Walk away: It is important to out the fire before it blazes so it could be helpful to walk away from the heated situation.

These tips might sound archaic and a sign of weakness. However, no angry person can win a battle. It is in the calmness you can conquer yourself and others. So let us be careful and help angry people be normal. This way we can eradicate this disease of anger.